


i've been here the whole time singing you a song

by evanbuckleydiaz



Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Buck takes care of Eddie, Clothes Sharing, Comfort/Angst, Cuddling, Fluff and Angst, Gen, Holding Hands, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, bed sharing, buddie working through traumas together as they should, coda eddie begins, eddie does some necessary crying, evan buckley gives the best cuddles and that's on that
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-30
Updated: 2020-06-30
Packaged: 2021-03-04 06:28:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,390
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24999100
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/evanbuckleydiaz/pseuds/evanbuckleydiaz
Summary: Coda 3x15, station 118 crew gets back to the station after everything that went down on the scene. Buck takes care of Eddie and Eddie does some necessary crying.
Relationships: Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV)
Comments: 10
Kudos: 203





	i've been here the whole time singing you a song

The 118 had made it back from the scene. Eddie has been checked over three times already by Chim and Hen. They did a thorough examination, their professional opinion was that Eddie didn’t need to go to hospital, they patched up his wounds and told Buck to monitor him through the night, give him lots of fluids and pain meds if he needs any. Buck nodded. Buck hadn’t let go of Eddie’s hand after he felt Eddie’s fingers intertwine with his own when he got out of the water. He has to keep holding on, just to be sure that Eddie is really there. Eddie hasn’t tried to let go of his hand either, maybe he needs the reassurance too that he really made it out. That he really is alive. 

Buck helps him out of his gear. Buck gently pulls the fly down and peels the gear away and winces a little at the purple bruises Eddie got forming under his uniform. Buck helps him into Buck’s extra LAFD sweats, there was no way Eddie was wearing the jeans he got to work in. Buck buttons Eddie’s long sleeved flannel up and looks at Eddie with a worried expression. Eddie hasn’t said a word. His eyes have still got the red rings from the irritation caused by mud and water. Eddie looks at Buck tiredly. He’s still shivering. Buck asks if he’s still cold and Eddie’s too tired to actually form words so he just nods. “Here, I’ll give you my LAFD hoodie. When we get home, we’ll make hot chocolate and some sandwiches and we’ll go to sleep, okay?” He looks at Buck and suddenly his eyes widen and he almost falls into Buck’s arms. “Eddie, Eddie, what’s is it? Tell me, does your head spin?” Buck starts panicking. “No, it’s-it’s Christopher. I have to see my son. I have to see-” Eddie is having some kind of panic attack.

“Eddie, it’s Buck here. You are at the fire house. You are okay. Christopher is okay. Christopher is with abuela tonight, remember? You called them before today, to make sure he’s fine spending the night there when we saw that the shift was gonna run late. Remember that?” Buck tries to calm him down. “I...I remember. I called abuela. They were making coo-cookies. Chocolate chip.” Eddie answers. It takes him time to form the sentence. He seems to calm down a little. “That’s right. Now we’ll get into my car and we’ll drive to get Christopher home. And I’m definitely getting some of those delicious Diaz cookies”, Buck adds while he’s packing his own things. 

Buck walks Eddie to his Jeep, opens the door and helps him in. Buck starts the car and they head out of the fire station. Eddie almost falls asleep in the front seat. Buck is chatting about everything, he is just wired that way. After stressful day he likes to talk about anything. He chatters about some baseball game he saw on tv yesterday, Eddie thinks. He’s not really sure. He just loves listening to Buck’s voice when he talks about things he’s interested in. His voice is actually very soothing and Eddie feels like home when he listens him. 

Maybe Eddie fell asleep for a second, because when he next opens his eyes they are in his abuela’s drive way. “Go see your son”, Buck whispers to him, voice little raw. Eddie nods and if he had the power, he would run out of the car but he is so exhausted he walks slowly to abuela’s door. Buck is right there besides him, holding his hand again. When abuela comes to the door, she gasps when she sees Eddie’s condition. Eddie doesn’t care and just hurries to Chris, who’s standing behind abuela, and grabs him in the biggest hug. He holds onto Chris tightly, like his life depends on him. Maybe his life does depend on Chris. When he almost gave up the fight for his life, he kept thinking of Christopher and Buck. He had to get back to his family. He promised to always get back to his family. Eddie is swallowing his tears. He just looks at his son. He wouldn’t be here without him.

“Chris”, Eddie whispers voice rasping. “Daddy, what happened to you? Your eyes are red!” Chris notices. “You know buddy, daddy had a really long day at work, I had to save a little boy and it was...it was very difficult but daddy got him out, he’s fine now. And daddy is fine too, I just got some mud and water into my eyes so they are just irritated because of that. Daddy is okay”, Eddie prayed Chris wouldn’t ask any questions tonight, he really didn’t know how to explain it, not tonight anyway. “I’m happy that you’re okay, daddy. I baked cookies today”, Chris presses closer to Eddie. “Oh yeah, Buck here has been dreaming about the cookies whole day, what do you say Chris, should we give Buck some cookies?” Eddie smiles and caresses Chris hair. He doesn’t know how he got so lucky with his kid. He just loves him so much it feels overwhelming. It’s the power carrying him through times he didn’t believe he could make it out. His love for his son. 

Chris bursts into giggles and yells to Buck “Hey Buck, there’s cookies in the kitchen!” Buck who’s been explaining the situation to abuela limps (cold rain really doesn’t agree with his bad leg) over to his Diaz boys and beams at Chris “Really, I’ve been waiting for those special Christopher Diaz cookies all day!” Chris wiggles out of Eddie’s embrace and goes with Buck to kitchen. Eddie hears Chris explaining about the cookies’s baking process very professionally. 

Eddie gets up and it’s his turn to be hugged, by his abuela. She says she’s grateful to see Eddie alive. “I’m okay abuela. Buck will spend the night with us”, Eddie reassures her. Then they just hug each other in silence. Chris and Buck get back from kitchen, Buck saying Chris’s cookies are the best ever. Eddie tells Chris to gather his things, it’s time to head home. Buck goes to start the car, he puts the seat warmer on because he noticed Eddie is still cold. Eddie carries Chris to the car, Chris could walk by himself but Eddie feels like he needs to hold him close and Chris is 5 minutes away from passing out anyway. Eddie puts Chris in his car seat (yes Buck’s jeep has a car seat just for Chris) gently and kisses his forehead. Chris smiles to him and almost immediately when they start driving he falls asleep. 

When they get to Eddie’s, Eddie carries Chris inside. Chris doesn’t wake up and Eddie goes to put him straight to bed. He sits in his bedside a lot longer than usually. Finally Buck enters the room and smiles softly at the doorway. Eddie gets up, kisses Chris’s forehead once more and whispers “good night buddy. I love you more than anything”. Buck goes to say good night to his little super man too, and for a brief moment they just look at Chris, both standing in the doorway. 

Eddie sighs. Suddenly he feels all the emotions hit him. Emotions he hadn’t allowed himself to feel. Flashbacks from Cristopher’s childhood. Flashbacks from war. Flashbacks from moments with Buck and Chris. Flashbacks from his moments with Buck. Eddie feels hot tears behind his eyes burning like the mud from under ground. He notices he’s shaking and it’s harder to breathe. “Eddie, man, you alright?” Eddie just looks at him with pained eyes. Buck guides Eddie out of Christopher’s door to living room. 

Eddie is trying so hard to hold back the tears and just breathe. “Eddie, you are okay. Eddie, come here. I got you” He hears Buck saying. Eddie lets Buck close him in an Evan Buckley Teddy Bear hug. He trembles against Buck. Buck holds him in his big arms.“Eddie, let go. Let go. I got you. I’m here, I got you”, Buck whispers to him. Eddie’s breathing comes out now in sobs and then he just lets go of everything holding him in place. He collapses against Buck, clinging into him like he’s his life line. Which he kind of is. Buck caresses Eddie’s back and Eddie cries like he hasn’t cried in a very long time. He just breaks down. He cries inconsolably against Buck and Buck just holds him quietly. Whispering soft things to him. Pressing little kisses to his head. Holding Eddie’s head under his chin. Eddie feels the safest there. “I-I almost lost...you and...Chris”, Eddie cries. “I know. I know. But you are here now. Chris is in his bed, I’m here with you.” Buck didn’t even notice before, but he has tears in his own eyes too. He almost lost today the one person that matters to him the most. He couldn’t let himself feel that loss. Not tonight. He needed to be strong for Eddie. After a while, Eddie has cried it all out. He is so tired. Buck keeps holding onto him and running his hands soothingly though his hair and whispering sweet things to him.

“Do you feel like eating and drinking something? You really should try to eat something you know, you haven’t eaten in who knows how many hours”, Buck asks him softly after a quiet moment of them just hugging each other. “Yeah, I could eat”, Eddie answers quietly. Buck goes to make some hot chocolate and sandwiches. Eddie follows Buck to the kitchen, like he’s afraid to be alone. Eddie eats with Buck their night snack and food has never tasted so good. He didn’t even realise how hungry he was. “Do you feel like showering?” Buck asks him next. “Yeah. I don’t know tho, I’m really tired. Could...Could you help me to shower? I understand if you don’t, I can just shower tomorrow”, Eddie blushes a little. “Hey, of course I’ll help you. No doubt about it, let’s go get you showered”, Buck smiles to him and Eddie is so grateful for having Buck here. 

Buck helps him out of his clothes and blushes when he sees Eddie’s body. Even though he has seen him naked before in locker room. But the man is just so beautiful. “Uhh, so just get under the water, I’ll wash your hair first”, Buck clears his throat. Today is not the time to think about inappropriate things. Eddie relaxes under Buck’s touch. Buck is at the same time gentle and firm enough. He’s perfect. When Eddie is all cleaned up, Buck treats his wounds the way Hen told him to. Eddie winces at the touch. Buck gets him a glass of water and gives him some Tylenol he finds in the medicine cabinet to help with the pain. Eddie is shivering again after the shower and Buck helps him into fresh clean sweats and t-shirt. Then Eddie brushes his teeth and goes to get Buck some sweats while Buck takes a quick shower. 

When Buck has changed and brushed his teeth, there is a slightly awkward moment where Buck thinks where he should sleep. He doesn’t really want to sleep alone, he doesn’t still quite believe Eddie is really there. On the other hand, he doesn’t wanna intrude Eddie’s personal space. “So, good night then. I should probably head to the guest room”, Buck mumbles, avoiding Eddie’s eyes. “Yeah, or...Buck could you sleep with me tonight? I know it’s a lot to ask but I really don’t feel like sleeping alone tonight and...it would just be nicer to have you there. Also you are like this big heater so I wouldn’t get cold”, Eddie smiles to Buck. Buck’s eyes start to shine again and he just nods ”Yeah, I would love to be your heater for tonight”, he smirks at him. 

Eddie’s bed is like the best bed Buck has ever slept in. It’s so soft and big. They say good night to each other and close their eyes. Buck tries to sleep, it’s funny how he’s been up for so many hours, getting no rest and now when he could sleep he can’t. Eddie tosses and turns around. “Eddie”, Buck whispers. Eddie opens his eyes terrified. “Buck”, he croaks. “Can’t sleep, huh?” Buck asks. He’s no stranger to sleeping problems after traumatic events. There’s a moment of silence. “Would you...Do you feel like you need to be close tonight? Would that help you sleep?” Buck asks almost shyly. “Yeah, that would be nice, actually”, Eddie smiles to him. Buck shuffles closer to Eddie. Eddie starts to turn to cuddle Buck, but Buck stops him with a little smile across his face ”You really thought I was gonna let you be big spoon tonight? Eddie, c’moon, you are the little spoon tonight. I’m holding you through the night”. “Fine, fine”, Eddie snorts at him but he doesn’t really mind. 

He turns over and presses closer to Buck’s muscular chest. Buck pulls Eddie into his ridiculously strong arms. Buck’s hold feels really good. Eddie loves the feeling of Buck’s embrace. He feels like he has found a place he never wants to leave. He feels...Eddie doesn’t even notice when the tears start running again. “Eddie, I got you”, Buck murmurs to his ear so close he can feel Buck’s lips brush the sensitive skin there. The touch sends shivers down Eddie’s spine. “Are you still cold?” Buck keeps murmuring. “I’ll have to warm you up don’t I” he whispers as he pulls Eddie closer. Eddie turns to look at him with soft smile playing on his lips. Buck stares back at him with his ocean blue piercing eyes. There’s a moment of silence, the two man just looking at each other. “Yeah, well maybe you should”, Eddie keeps smiling. “Maybe I will. I’ve been told the Evan Buckley cuddles are the best cuddles you can get, so enjoy. Are you okay if we try sleeping now?” he asks Eddie softly. “Yeah, let’s get some sleep”, Eddie smiles back and closes his eyes. Buck does the same and nuzzles his nose into Eddie’s neck. Eddie sighs and soon they both fell asleep. Holding hands, of course.


End file.
